Log in

No account? Create an account
Agent Smith..   
09:56pm 17/06/2003
mood: amused

"Hahaha, really? I like fairies too!"

(17 pathetic humans died. | Dodge a bullet.)

Well well well...   
09:39pm 17/06/2003
  Have not updated journal in long time, as work at agency has been v. hectic. Smith not terminated, only promoted, the bastard. Something about "actually doing something besides updating those damn livejournals you pathetic agents keep. What are you, HUMAN?"
To quote our good friend Agent White.

Apparently, there is something he needs to see.
What now?
Should be promoted, not that lazy ass Smith.
Hate him v. much. Along with Star Wars movie. Rushed into lounge because hear v. hot voice of the v. good looking human Mr. McGregor, and see fairies fighting eachother with glowing sticks.

Turns out some agents were watching it.
Ergo, they too, are fairies.
(new word- learned from hip young teenager humans at school. Am STILL assigned to JHS 4798 MISSION. Bastards.)

(1 pathetic humans died. | Dodge a bullet.)

HA HA HA.   
11:46am 31/05/2003
mood: drunk
Had much fun after work with Agent Schuldies, we attended a human "bar" where many of the inferior life forms were drunk. Messed with their heads- good stuff.

Schuldies also took several candid shots of me. Must be destroyed. Several include me after being rather intoxicated.

Did not know that agents can get intoxicated. How v. odd.
Agent Smith has not been at work for last few days. Can only hope that one of the programs terminated him or something of the like.
Would be v. muchly overjoyed if did happen.

(Dodge a bullet.)

Stupid Agent Decker   
10:32pm 30/05/2003
mood: bitchy
Am v. annoyed. Agent Decker not only stole my entire userlookup, but also will not get off the goddamned telephone so I can call them.

Should be boarding train to have business meeting with "her" tomorrow. Need to know whether I should stop resting at 5:30 or not.

Am frazzled. Leave me alone.

(Dodge a bullet.)

Johnson? Who would have thought?   
10:18pm 30/05/2003
mood: blank
Am in interesting mood. V. odd. Read more under cut.
Read more...Collapse )

(3 pathetic humans died. | Dodge a bullet.)

05:18pm 29/05/2003
mood: annoyed

Which Agent Smith are you?

By Madeline Elster

Am SO not ANY of the agent smiths. What an ass.

The mission thing turned out to be an entire disaster when ended up smacking an adolescent boy up onto the "gymnasium" roof, for being a fool. He sustained a few injuries, such as 12 broken ribs.

Perhaps was not such a good idea?

But now am suspended from all missions for the next week, or however long that inferior program decides to keep me at the agency.

This time got caught drawing insulting caricatures of Smith on "Paint" program. He's more furious than last time. Will post picture as soon as ASP host is up again.

(2 pathetic humans died. | Dodge a bullet.)

11:07am 24/05/2003
mood: bored
Nothing to update about. Chambers is being the usual pain-in-the-ass.

V. boring around the agency on weekends.

The anniversary of my program's creation is in a few days. Perhaps should schedule party?

Have tried to curb bordeom by making various works of art with staples. Will most likely get me in abit of trouble if supervisors find out, but is only thing to do right now.

(11 pathetic humans died. | Dodge a bullet.)

Am going to kill self.   
10:11pm 22/05/2003
Must admit, v. convincing advertising campgain, tho.

(2 pathetic humans died. | Dodge a bullet.)

Well, well, well...   
09:16pm 22/05/2003
mood: amused
Look who's got a livejournal.... agent_decker

(Dodge a bullet.)

08:51pm 22/05/2003
mood: cynical
Today was v. stressful day at agency. Agent White bragging about latest mission. So he got to destroy programs all day while I sat at our half-assed dial-up connected computers, researching pointless things for Chambers... Am still much better agent. White is extreme pansy.

Should be terminated.

He is a useless program anyway. Is only good for experimenting with new weapons, as cannot die, although the whole no-pain thing is not v. entertaining.

(Dodge a bullet.)

Sleeping is for humans.   
12:54am 22/05/2003
mood: annoyed
Am off work now, must go back to Agency at 6:00.
Bought black robe to match sunglasses. Go me.

V. boring. Smith will still not tell me how he replicates himself.

Must interrogate him. Repetitive viewing of "Lord of The Rings" should get the information. Hobbits are a virus.
Am v. good at this.

(Dodge a bullet.)

Bought new sunglasses.   
09:31pm 21/05/2003
mood: content
Perhaps agency not so bad after all. Bought new sunglasses, although not really as spiffy as the previous ones. Look too much like Trinity's.

Must admit, Neo v. good looking.
Stupid Trinity. Shall be destroyed along with Agent Chambers.

(2 pathetic humans died. | Dodge a bullet.)

My mind is v. evil.   
08:01pm 21/05/2003
mood: devious
Have discovered new way to kill dispose of Agent Chambers. Will kidnap and force repeat viewing of "Ash Wednesday".

The human film.

As he can dodge bullets, had to find alternative way to do him in.
Yes. V. brilliant.

(Dodge a bullet.)

07:46pm 21/05/2003
mood: enraged
Clumsy Agent Smith stepped on my spify sunglasses and broke them! Now have personal vendetta against all in Agency besides Agent Decker.
Fools. They do not know what I am capable of.
Must destroy all that oppose me.
As, er, soon, as I finish this project of course...
(V. pathetic of me...)

(2 pathetic humans died. | Dodge a bullet.)

02:14pm 21/05/2003
mood: intimidated
I need Agent Decker. Where is Agent Decker?
Lack of allies is making my outlook on defeating Chambers bleak.

(Dodge a bullet.)

Stupid Agent Chambers...   
01:41pm 21/05/2003
mood: enraged
Found "Kick me" signs. Is v. angry.
Has sent me on mission to study behavior of humans. Think I shall die.
Tuesday I will be sent to a "Junior High School" to observe and learn about the "teenagers."

Teenagers are of the devil. V. much so.

Agent Chambers must be disposed of v. soon if I am to find my way out of this. Stupid man. Why don't I ever get hunt-and-destroy missions. Am v. good at things like that. Would not mind killing humans. V. entertaining.

But no! I have to associate with PRE-ADOLESCENT HUMANS.
How will I survive?
V. upset.

(3 pathetic humans died. | Dodge a bullet.)

Perhaps "LiveJournal" not so good idea after all.   
12:15pm 21/05/2003
mood: content
Agent Chambers has been hovering. Will not stop annoying me about how the computers are "not for personal use."
May have to dispose of him. V. aggravating.
For now have resorted to sticking small papers on his back which say "Kick me".
Am v. funny.
Go me.

(Dodge a bullet.)

Agent Brown...   
11:32am 21/05/2003
mood: enraged
And those "PowerAde" commercials.
What is next?
Smith advertising "Dr. Pepper"?
Digusting human drinks...

(2 pathetic humans died. | Dodge a bullet.)

11:01am 21/05/2003
mood: angry
So. I have aquired a so called "Live-Journal", aye.
Apparently it is a sort of device for pathetic humans to whine through.
Perhaps shall give it a try?
Agent Smith is an pretentious bastard.
Never will allow me to accompany him along on any missions.
Damn him.
Should leave agency. V. stressful.
Excellent idea. Of course, would not work. Vast knowledge of fighting skills would not be a good quality if took up job in teaching. Human children are of the devil.

(Dodge a bullet.)